I haven't blogged in ages. Sometimes stuff happens in life and you find your previous commitments wavering due to new ones, and this is what has happened to me. I am not going into the big long disgustingly adorable, soppy, film-esque story, but the short and short of it is that I have a boyfriend now (yay for unintentional Boys Like Girls song references) and most of my time has been spent with him. (:

The strange thing about the past 8 weeks and 3 days (not that I'm counting xD) is that I've had little time to think. Obviously I've been thinking, but usually I analyse and ponder over every aspect of my life. I used to take time to do this because I had time to do this. And also, there were gaps in my life for me to fill with daydreams and way too good to be true hypothetical situations that I never truly believed happened to anyone, much less to myself.

More on that later.

My boyfriend (Stuart) goes to the same uni as me. He lives in the and Halls, down the same corridor. We spend pretty much 24/7 together. Because we can, and we want to and it's perfect that way. There's litle or no time for the independent, deep thought processes I used to have most days, because my mind is otherwise engaged. For the most part, I don't miss it at all, because I have no reason to. But as of last Friday, me and Stu are with our respective families and had to say goodbye for the next 9 days. Having so much of my own company for the first time in over 8 weeks is extremely strange, and has made me realise things.

Firstly, I don't like my own company very much. I like it when I'm working on a personal project, such as photo editing or vlogging, but in large doses I get very lonely. I need near-constant interaction.

Secondly, I work better with people around me. I am much happier sitting down and doing 5 hours of Photoshop coursework if I have 3 people sitting on my bed behind me having a chat. I need to know I've got friends around me, or I don't feel the same level of academic motivation. I think this is because I work better if people are impressed with the work I'm doing; their praise and compliments are incentive to push myself harder.

Thirdly, the past 8 weeks and 3 days hadn't sunk in at all. I knew this at the time to be fair, and kept telling Stu so. But only know that I've got the time to truly process how much my life has changed can I really digest it. I knew I was grateful, and mindblown and I knew how lucky I felt. But now I can really see what's happened, and I think I'm starting to honestly believe it's real.

I didn't believe it to be real at first. I convinced myself on several occasions I'd made the whole scenario up in my head. Purely because it just seems too good to be real. It's all so, so perfect. This isn't gonna be a mahoosive cheesy blog, I just want to iterate how unfathomable some things in life can be.

I think we all underestimate everything. We complain about people, and think the worst of them. We're pessimistic and cynical and we tell ourselves that it will work out for everyone but not for yourself. And we blame ourselves, or other people, because we feel like we have to blame someone.

But what I've learnt whilst having this time to myself to think is that sometimes you have to stop, breathe, absorb everything you've got and really take the time to let it sink in. We have to go out of our way to appreciate and be grateful for everything and everyone in our lives, because otherwise we'll never truly and clearly see just how lucky we are.